1.10.07

Dear Natasha,


if i talk. if i speak. if i say something out loud. even if no one is around. I'm letting go of something and putting a piece of me out there. where do thoughts go when they die? and why does my mind go so fast... why am i racing with myself? i have to stop me. my brain is a traitor. it thinks things that scare me. it thinks things that disgust me. my brain is my enemy. it wants things it cant have. it wants things that i don't want. my brain is a rebel. it asks questions it doesn't have the right to ask and it asks questions i don't want to know the answer to. but isn't my brain me? isn't that all i really am? i think therefore i am. so all i am... all anyone really is is that big squishy thing...the brain. the body is just a tool to help the brain. I'm just a big squishy ball. i was thinking something earlier... but I've forgotten what it was... I'm dumb.